IX. CAN YOU MAKE TOUGHER CAREER DECISIONS?

Let’s presume you’ve taken a realistic look at your innate tendencies and social context, your talents and tastes. You know yourself, at least reasonably well. You’ve eliminated any false assumptions you may have collected. You have considered all the careers that exist (and maybe a few that don’t yet exist). You are now much closer to finding your life’s work. There’s another big step you must take, though, and this one’s a doozie.
The tough thing about realizing you have many choices is that you must decide between them. After all, how much you know becomes less significant if you can’t make up your mind to do something with it. Of course, a decision made in a specific moment can have long-lasting consequences. No wonder some people are decision-avoidant. Each time we make a poor decision we can become more hesitant to trust our judgment.
Good decision-making is an art and a science. It is also a skill that can be learned. The most successful people on the planet swear by the need to make fast, frequent and
(mostly) good decisions. Legendary business giant Malcolm Forbes went so far as to maintain that his success was due to the numbers of decisions he was capable of making,
rather than the quality of each one. Presumably, Malcolm spent some extra time on the really big decisions involving marriage, family---and his life’s work.
Scientists are studying the reasons why some people are capable of making decisions more quickly, and why some people seem to make better decisions than others.
Learning to make good decisions can make a wonderful difference in your career and your life.
Here are some of the most well known prescribed methods used by businesses to help them make decisions (Mindtools). Some are pretty complicated, including Benjamin Franklin’s brilliant Cost/Benefit Analysis, now over 200 years old.

· Cost-Based Analysis- used for financially-based decisions
· Decision Tree- placing a value on each option
· Force Field Analysis- analyzing the relative pressures for and against change
· Grid Analysis- making a choice by considering many factors
· Paired Comparison Analysis- Figuring out the importance of each option
· Pareto Analysis- deciding what you should change
· PMI- weighing the advantages and disadvantages of each decision
· Six Thinking Hats- (my favorite)- looking at the predicament/decision from different perspectives

All of these, and other, decision-making methods, have value, and can act as tools, helping you think about and zero in on your life’s work. Depending on the factors in consideration, and on the way you think, you will be more comfortable with some methods than others. For a detailed description of these and other methods, you can go to a business training website (such as mindtools.com) or simply research on line.
All of these methods utilize the following fundamental principles:
Understand the problem and goals clearly, so you can consider a wide variety of alternative courses of action.
The creation of many possible solutions to the problem. You can't use an imaginative solution unless you imagine it.
Collect all the conveniently available information about the probable outcome of each course of action. See if there aren't synergistic ways of combining several promising solutions into potent solutions.
Weigh the pros and cons of each course of action (solution), then decide on one that you can commit yourself to fully.
Get Out Of Your Own Way
The final decision of what to do with your precious life rests with you and you alone, so you want to be sure that you not stand in the way of your own good choices.
Psychological barriers to decision-making have been described by T.I.Rubin (1986).
Being out of touch with our real feelings and values can lead to a resigned, or detached “I don’t care” attitude. In reality, such people are paralyzed, uninvolved, and indecisive.
Self-doubt, depression, anxiety and hidden anger can interfere with decision-making and cause self-defeating actions.
· An exaggerated opinion of onesself can cause unwise decisions, made just to boost the ego and make a good impression.
· Being overly dependent on approval of others, of being liked, of being afraid to make waves or wanting to be viewed as self-sacrificing, hinders good decisions.
· Wishful thinking, perfectionism, hoping something better will come along, all stall progress.
· Self-criticism after making a poor decision can make us avoid future important decisions.
· Fear of certain outcomes can keep us from considering some alternatives that might be good ones
· A rush of emotion can cause us to think we MUST make a decision right now, or we MUST put off our decision. Both can have disastrous results. We must be thinking straight to make good, timely decisions.
A number of the above dynamics are illustrated in this story of a student of mine.
Designated Diva
Tanja was a talented vocalist whose abilities were recognized at a young age. Like many of my music students, her parents were completely supportive of her desire to be a recording artist, and they spent tens of thousands of dollars on instruction, dance and patter coaching, and recording sessions. School was less important, and Tanja barely completed high school. Much time was spent in Los Angeles conferring with opportunistic PR firms and she and her parents were surprised and alarmed at the number of amazing young musicians there were. She had a couple of good breaks, but nothing had panned out by the time she was 20 and her efforts were now sporadic. Her parents, recognizing that fame and fortune had not happened and might not happen, despite their faith in her unquestionable talent, started to be concerned. They had not prepared their daughter for the real world. Tough love ensued.
After much cajoling, they insisted she get a job and move out on her own.
What, she asked me, did they expect her to do? She was a musician. Surely they did not expect her to work at Starbucks. Wouldn’t that be a colossal waste of time for an extremely talented and unique musician? She stayed with a friend for a few weeks and her folks pitched in occasionally. She felt abandoned by her parents and friends, who didn’t realize that it was just a matter of time until she was famous. She couldn’t bear ordinary work. Fortunately, she got occasional studio jingle jobs, but it wasn’t enough.
I cared for Tanja. She had been my student since the age of 9. I knew it was not all her fault that she had expected to live a fantasy. She had truly been her parent’s dear designated diva. Together we looked at alternatives. Over time, humbled and working, she put her music in perspective. Now she is taking a few classes at her parent’s expense, working 30 hours a week at a flower kiosk and playing two nights a week at a coffee house. She sings a jingle occasionally, maintains a website and creates demos and promotes her music whenever she can. She has self-produced a full-length CD on a shoestring, to sell at her shows. Despite her disappointments, her pure love of music, not fame, drives her. She is realistic now and is making better decisions for the whole of life, come what may. As a result, she is also easier to work with and more grateful for the opportunities in music that she does find. Tanja still has her dream, but she also has a real job for the real world. She is no longer a designated diva.